t’s 8:30 p.m. You finally collapse onto the couch with your glass of wine, ready for a moment of quiet. You take a deep breath, maybe even start scrolling through your phone—and then the baby monitor lights up. Again.
If you’re living in this cycle of endless night wakings, you’re not alone. Almost every family I talk to has been here. And, so have I. The good news? Your little one can sleep through the night—but it often takes a closer look at what’s happening throughout the entire day, not just bedtime.
(Note: These strategies are geared toward babies who are past the newborn stage. Newborns still require middle-of-the-night feeds, which are developmentally appropriate.)
Why Babies and Toddlers Wake at Night
There are a handful of common culprits that cause night wakings. Let’s break them down in plain language:
1. Sleep Associations
If your baby always falls asleep while feeding, rocking, or with a pacifier, chances are they’ll expect the same thing every time they wake at night. Babies naturally cycle through lighter and deeper sleep, and if they don’t know how to drift back on their own, they’ll call out for you.
👉 Pro Tip: Move the bedtime feed to the very first step of your routine. This way, your baby is awake and alert during the feed, bath, pajamas, and story. It prevents the feed from becoming the “sleep cue” and helps your child learn to fall asleep in their crib instead of on the breast or bottle.
2. Overtired or Undertired
It sounds strange, but both too much and too little daytime sleep can cause rough nights. If your baby is overtired, cortisol (a stress hormone) makes it harder to settle and stay asleep. If they’re not tired enough, bedtime can turn into a battle and lead to frequent wake-ups.
The secret to getting this balance right is watching wake windows—the amount of time your child can comfortably stay awake between naps and before bedtime. Here’s a simple guide:
Newborns (0–10 weeks): 45–60 minutes
11 weeks to 5 months: about 1.5-2 hours
5 to 7 months: 2.5–3 hours
8 to 13 months: 3–4 hours
14 months to 3 years old: 5–6 hours
If your baby is consistently overtired by bedtime, try shortening their last wake window. If they’re wide awake and ready to party at 9 p.m., they may need longer stretches of awake time during the day.
3. Inconsistent Routines
Children thrive on predictability. When naps, bedtime, or even the steps of your bedtime routine shift from day to day, your child’s body clock gets out of sync. That often shows up as multiple night wakings.
4. The Sleep Environment
Even the best sleeper can be disrupted by the room being too bright, too noisy, or too warm. Think of the environment as your baby’s “sleep cue.” If it’s not consistent, it can throw them off.
Why Quick Fixes Aren’t Always Enough
You might be tempted to try one or two changes tonight—and sometimes that helps! Maybe you move bedtime earlier, add blackout curtains, or shift the feed to the beginning of the routine. But more often than not, the bigger breakthrough comes when we zoom out and look at the whole 24-hour picture.
Daytime naps, timing of feeds, wake windows, and even where your baby sleeps all play into how the night goes. Fixing one piece of the puzzle while ignoring the others usually leaves families stuck in the same cycle.
What You Can Do Tonight
If you’re desperate for some relief right away, here are a few small steps you can try:
Aim for an earlier bedtime if your baby is consistently cranky by late afternoon.
Darken the sleep space so that it’s pitch black—even the glow of a nightlight can be enough to wake a sensitive sleeper.
Move the bedtime feed to the first step of the routine, making sure your baby is awake during the feed and the rest of the routine.
Keep the bedtime routine simple and predictable—same order, same steps, every night.
These quick wins may not solve everything, but they’re a great starting point.
The Real Solution: A Plan That Works for Your Family
Every child is unique, and so is every family. What works for your friend’s baby down the street may not work for yours. That’s why creating a personalized sleep plan that takes into account naps, feedings, routines, and your parenting style makes all the difference.
Imagine lying down at night knowing your little one will stay asleep. Imagine reclaiming your evenings with your partner or actually waking up rested. It’s possible—I see it happen every day with the families I work with.
Ready for Better Sleep?
If your baby’s night wakings are leaving you exhausted, I’d love to help. Let’s hop on a free discovery call so we can talk through what’s happening in your home and map out the next steps toward a full night’s sleep for the whole family.