How to Weed Out the Good Advice from the Bad as a New Parent
Becoming a new mom can feel overwhelming, especially when you’re bombarded with conflicting advice. Everywhere you turn, there are old wives' tales, heavy suggestions, and unsolicited advice laden with judgment. You've probably heard things like, "Try rice cereal in the bottle, it will make your baby sleep longer," or "Waking up five times a night is normal, and not sleeping for two years is just part of being a mom." These myths couldn’t be further from the truth—and the latter, frankly, makes me a bit riled up!
Sleep is not a luxury; it’s a necessity.
Adults need 7-9 hours of sleep to stay healthy and happy. In fact, chronic sleep deprivation can be as dangerous as being intoxicated. Prioritizing your sleep begins by teaching your little one to become a great sleeper.
So, let’s bust some of those common baby sleep myths you might have encountered.
1. If My Baby Wakes at Night, He Must Be Hungry
While it's true that babies need to eat frequently, the idea that they wake up because they’re always hungry is not always the case—especially if your baby is older than a newborn. Babies older than 3 months often use night feeds to help themselves get back to sleep.
If your baby wakes and falls asleep within minutes of feeding, it's likely that the feed is just a sleep association rather than an actual hunger cue. To help break this cycle, try moving the feed to the first step of the bedtime routine to help your baby learn how to fall asleep without depending on it.
Many babies are consuming most of their calories at night, which affects their daytime intake. If you can shift those calories to daytime feedings, both baby and mom can benefit from better, more restorative sleep.
2. Babies Younger Than 6 Months Cannot Be Sleep Trained
Here’s the thing: Sleep training doesn't mean you can’t feed your baby at night; it means teaching your baby to fall asleep without external sleep crutches like a pacifier, rocking, or feeding. Sleep training helps babies learn to link their sleep cycles and fall asleep on their own.
Now, babies younger than 4 months typically don’t have the developmental ability to self-soothe. But, you can shape sleep habits early on to help your newborn grow into a great sleeper—without the need for formal sleep training down the road.
By six months, many babies are developmentally ready to sleep through the night and drop their night feedings—provided they're healthy and thriving. It’s a game-changer for both baby and parents!
3. My Baby Isn’t Sleeping Because He’s Teething
If this were true, no baby would be sleeping through the night until age 2.5, which is pretty unrealistic. While teething can cause discomfort, it usually lasts for a few days. So, if your baby has been struggling with sleep for months, teething is likely not the cause.
In fact, teething does not cause the following symptoms, and if they appear, it’s time to call your pediatrician:
High fever (104°F or higher)
Diarrhea
Rash
Excessive crying
Runny nose or congestion
Refusal to breastfeed or bottle-feed
If teething has been ongoing and is affecting sleep, there’s a good chance that something else is going on, and it’s worth investigating further.
4. Babies Should Nap in Brightly Lit Rooms
Contrary to popular belief, babies sleep best in dark, cool, and quiet environments—the ideal conditions for creating a soothing sleep atmosphere. Think of a dark, cave-like room where your baby can relax fully.
When your baby sleeps in a dark room, their body produces melatonin, the hormone that regulates sleep. A dark environment also signals to the brain that it’s time to sleep. If you want the best sleep environment for your baby, consider investing in blackout curtains or a room-darkening solution to block out any light. I recommend Blackoutez and Sleepout as excellent options (use code andimetzlersleep for a discount).
Final Thoughts: Sleep is a Necessity, Not a Luxury
Don’t let outdated myths about baby sleep hijack your well-being. Sleep is critical for everyone in the family, and it’s worth making it a priority. Find a few reliable sources of parenting advice and ignore the rest. Your parenting style may evolve, and that’s perfectly fine. You can mix and match the advice that fits your family best—because cherry-picking what works for your family is more than okay.