Sleep training is the process of teaching your baby or child to fall asleep independently at bedtime and for naps. The goal is for your child, ideally 4 months or older, to sleep without relying on external aids like pacifiers, bouncing, rocking, or feeding. In short, sleep training and bed-sharing typically do not go hand in hand.

Why Sleep Training and Bed-Sharing Don’t Mix

When bed-sharing, babies often depend on feeding and close contact with a parent to fall asleep. This dependence usually extends to night wakings, where they need the same conditions to fall back asleep. Asking your baby to self-soothe and sleep independently while the things they rely on, such as nursing or physical contact, are right there but unavailable can be very confusing and counterproductive.

Parents who bed share and reach out for my help usually fall into two categories:

They want to transition their child from bed sharing to sleeping independently.
They want their child to stay in their bed but sleep independently and through the night.

If you fall into the first category, I can absolutely help you teach your child to become a great independent sleeper. For those in the second category, I’m unable to assist because the foundational principles of sleep training require the separation of sleep spaces. That said, I’m here for you if you decide to change your sleep arrangements.

Is Everyone in Your Family Happy with Their Sleep Situation?

If everyone in your home is happy and well-rested, then there’s no need to change your sleep situation. However, if your current arrangement isn’t working for everyone, I’m here to help you make a change.

Take a moment to evaluate where everyone in your family is sleeping. Common scenarios include:

One parent bed sharing with a child while the other sleeps in another room or on the couch.
Both parents bed sharing with different children in separate rooms.

If this setup works for your family, that’s great! But if it’s not ideal, consider steps to improve your family’s sleep. I recommend checking in every three months to ensure everyone is getting restorative, uninterrupted sleep in their chosen sleep spaces.

Will My Child “Grow Out of It”?

Sleep habits are notoriously hard to change, and children rarely “grow out of” challenging sleep patterns on their own.

When I became a mom 10 years ago, I spent months struggling with sleep deprivation, convinced my baby would eventually grow out of his sleep issues. Spoiler alert: nothing changed until I took proactive steps to teach him how to sleep well.

Over the years, I’ve worked with parents of babies, toddlers, preschoolers, and even elementary-aged children who assumed their kids would sleep independently when they were ready. While this may eventually happen, it could take years. If your child isn’t getting the quality sleep they need and your nights are fragmented, taking action now can make a significant difference.

Ready for a Change?

If you’re not sleeping well with your child in your bed but still want to keep them close, room sharing can be a fantastic option. This setup allows you to stay near your baby while providing separate sleep spaces for both of you.

For younger babies: Consider using a bassinet or travel crib in your room.
For older babies (6 months and up): Adding a visual barrier, like a partition, between your bed and your baby’s sleep space can help reduce stimulation and improve their sleep.

Don’t forget to make your room as dark as possible to create an optimal sleep environment!

Are You Hesitant to Make a Change?

If your family’s sleep situation is working well for you, you’ve likely stopped reading by now. But if you’re struggling, ask yourself these key questions:

Am I getting 7-9 hours of quality sleep each night?
Is my baby getting 11-12 hours of sleep (with age-appropriate night feeds, if necessary)?
Is everyone in the house sleeping well?
Is everyone sleeping where they’d like to be?

If your answers reveal that sleep needs aren’t being met, it’s time to consider making a change.

Let’s Create a Plan for Better Sleep

Figuring out how to improve your family’s sleep can feel overwhelming. That’s where I come in. I can help you break everything down into a personalized, manageable sleep plan tailored to your child’s needs.

Schedule your FREE 15-minute sleep evaluation call with me here. And don’t forget to follow me on Instagram for practical tips and weekly sleep Q&A sessions every Tuesday.

Better sleep is possible, and I’m here to help you every step of the way.