Bedtime routines are beneficial for babies, kids, and adults. I have a routine that helps me settle my mind and prepare for bed. Here’s what I do: put on pajamas, wash my face, brush my teeth, put a glass of water on my nightstand (which I almost never drink) and layout my earplugs in case my husband snores, arrange my pillows and think about what I’m grateful for as I drift to sleep. The steps of the routine, which happen in the same order each night, help me anticipate going to sleep. The process is equally important for toddlers and big kids. And hey, if you’ve never had a routine for your kiddo, it’s not too late. Start tonight!
In my previous post, I covered all you need to know about bedtime routines for newborns and babies. Now, let’s hone in on toddlers and big kids.
Before The Bedtime Routine Is The Wind-Down
Before we go into bedtime routines, let’s talk about what you can do to help your kiddo transition into the final part of their day. I call it a wind-down. A wind-down is meant to do 2 things: provide an opportunity for your little one to get out their wiggles for the last time and then calm down the energy before preparing the body for sleep.
Wind-Down Check List
After dinner, leave for about 20-30 minutes for a wind-down
The first half is for some physical play: get outside and run around or have that living-room wrestling match
Calm down the energy for the last half: lower the blinds or lights to get our sleepy hormone (melatonin) producing and do a low-key activity in the living room together
One last check to make sure all of your kiddo’s needs are met before they head to start the bedtime routine. Do they need a snack? Did they say goodnight to the dog? One more kiss goodnight to big brother? There should be NO reason to head back out to the common area of the house once you start the bedtime routine.
Prep Work For A Successful Bedtime Routine For Toddlers & Big Kids
You really can incorporate a bedtime routine at any time, but do some prep work so that you set up your kiddo for success. The most important tip I can share with you is to set very clear expectations.
Setting Clear Expectation For Bedtime
Kids need to know exactly what you expect them to and then they need to be reminded a bunch of times. For toddlers and big kids, so much of the bedtime is boundary work. I recommend having a series of questions that you regularly ask your kiddo so that they know exactly what to do at bedtime.
Example Questions
What happens after bathtime?
How many books do we read at bedtime?
Once mommy/daddy tucks you in, do you talk or lay quietly?
What do you do if you’re thirsty? Do you call for mommy or take a sip from your sippy cup?
What do you do if you wake in the night? Do you call for mommy/daddy or hug your blankie/stuffy etc. and go back to sleep?
Bedtime Routines for Toddlers & Big Kids
Bedtime routines for this age group might be longer than a baby simply because they can talk. I suggest keeping the bedtime routine to 30-40 minutes. It should be the same 5-7 steps that happen in exactly the same order every night. That way, your child finds comfort with the process and structure rather than the person putting them to bed.
Example Bedtime Routine For Toddlers
10-minute bath
Diaper, PJs, sleepsack (if still in a crib)
Song and/or books (same number of books each night)
Hugs & kisses
In the crib fully awake with 1-2 comfort items (same items each night)
Example Bedtime Routine For Big Kids
10-minute bath or shower
PJs
Song and/or books (same number of books each night)
5-minute meditation for 5-year-olds and older
Hugs & kisses
In the bed fully awake with 1-2 comfort items (same items each night)
Benefits Of A Bedtime Routine
There are so many benefits of a bedtime routine. If you incorporate a wind-down and bedtime routines your kids know exactly what to expect in the evening and that alleviates anxiety. They love to know what comes next. When they can anticipate the evening, and there are clear boundaries in place, there will be fewer tantrums. And that means that part of the day is more enjoyable for everyone.
Having a bedtime routine is the first step to teaching your child to be an independent sleeper. With that comes better mental and physical health, more energy, and a happier family. Oh yeah, and don’t forget it creates ‘You Time’. When you can quickly put your kiddo to be between 7-8 PM each night, it means you have several hours for yourself each day. That is an absolute must for happy moms.
If you need help with bedtime battles or any sleep struggles with your baby, toddler, or big kid, book a discovery call and we will talk about ways to get it on track so that your entire family sleeps well. It’s a game-changer.